As you can see I haven’t written much lately. Sadly, my father passed away on February 26th. After he battled a lengthy illness, his body succumbed to the withering effects from the battle he endured but continued to fight tenaciously to the end.
It has been an extremely tough time for me in the midst of his untimely death. My life will never be the same. He is now with my mother who died when I was only a young girl and my sister, Teresa, who died in 2002. And of course, with all of my “furry friends”.
And that is the reason I am writing about my dad. My dad and I shared a passion- the love for animals.
Pictured is my dad with my two “boys” Shadow and Jazz a few years ago. They would love to go see their “Pop-Pop”. Yes, I would actually say that. I have no (human) children and they loved visiting him.
My dad loved dogs and it was evident to me since I was a very little girl. I was raised with a dog named Prince who lived for 16 years. It was through Prince that I discovered the passion my dad and I shared for animals. Prince was more of a loner dog and didn’t possess an outgoing personality. He also didn’t play with anyone but my dad and me. When Prince died suddenly, it was my dad and me who took care of his burial. I rarely saw my dad cry but I witnessed his tears as he could not hold them back as we took Prince to his final resting place. Prince was his dog and it tore him up to say goodbye to his companion of 16 years.
This would not be the only time my dad and I shed tears over the loss of our pets. It was only two years later that my dad and I would be taking another dog of ours to her final resting place. Lenius was her name. Even though she lived in our house, Lenius was my dog but was loved by everyone. Lenius was my constant companion. I took her everywhere. We did so much together. She was the coolest dog. She became suddenly ill after I had noticed her belly was extended. Her liver was failing. I visited Lenius every day at the vet. That last day, the vet allowed me to stay until everyone had left except for him. Lenius was so ill and she wanted to come home with me. But I wanted her to get better. I said my goodbyes as I always did and that was the last time I ever saw her alive. It was my dad who drove me to retrieve her body. As we took her to her final resting place, once again it was my dad and me shedding tears together in the midst of our loss. He was the one who stood by me as I mourned for my precious Lenius.
Over the years we had many pets- all dogs. When I moved out, my dad and I each had our own dogs. But we always helped each other with our pets. One day, I received a phone call about my dad’s dog, Charlie. He said Charlie’s head was tilted and his behavior didn’t appear normal. I drove immediately to his home and saw how Charlie was unable to straighten out his head. I took both of them directly to the vet. Charlie had a stroke. With tender, loving care from dad, Charlie made a complete recovery. It was truly remarkable.
A year before Charlie passed away, I found a small dog in East Reading. I’m speaking about an old, almost-toothless chihuaha. I went door to door seeking the owner since this little guy couldn’t walk fast. No one knew him or ever saw him before. I placed an ad in the paper. Called the local animal shelters to see if anyone reported this dog missing. I didn’t want to drop him off at either shelter because I knew he would be euthanized in a short time if no one claimed him because of his age. Didn’t I tell you- he was 17 years old! Yes, that’s right. So, knowing my dad had the room to hold onto to him until I found his owner or a new one, I asked him if he would keep him until such time. Of course, my dad agreed.
The rest of the story. No one claimed Tiny- his new name- and my dad fell in love with the little guy. Poor Tiny’s gums were infected and he needed what few teeth he had remaining removed. We were told Tiny may not survive the ordeal. He did and he lived out the remainder of his life with his tongue dangling so delicately out of his mouth. Tiny and Charlie got along very well.
One day Charlie had a seizure and he was taken to the vet. His kidneys weren’t working. He never would return home again. As we prepared Charlie for his final resting place, Tiny had the exact same type of seizure Charlie just endured. It was an extremely difficult day for my dad.
One year later, Tiny’s heart was giving out and he was now in the care of the vet. Once again, my dad had to endure a dog’s kidneys giving out. I told my dad to ask permission to bring Tiny home for an overnight visit. I knew my dad was scared to do this but I knew it was the right thing to do. He brought Tiny home. Tiny was happy to be home again. He didn’t leave my dad’s side. Tiny became restless and my dad did everything to make him comfortable to no avail. But Tiny wanted to be in my dad’s arms so he could die in the person’s arms who saved his life. If it were not for my dad, Tiny would not have lived another two years.
My dad vowed never to have another pet again. He said the loss of a pet was too much for him to handle any longer. I tried to get him to adopt another dog from the Animal Rescue League when I worked there. I knew he liked this one dog I took to see him and said he would adopt her if no one else did. She was adopted and he never did have another dog.
However, as I said, we always had dogs. I was highly allergic to cats. One piece of cat hair could send me into a very bad asthma attack. Ironically, all of my brothers and sisters had or have cats. I couldn’t even take a step into their homes at times because of my severe allergic reactions. BUT, this isn’t about me, this is about my dad. I needed to find a home for a cat who had no place to live. I didn’t want to surrender him to a shelter because I know firsthand the majority of cats are euthanized at shelters. Not their fault but the cats’ previous owners.
Well, long story made short……..my dad had a cat for the first time in his life. And he enjoyed it! I was so happy for both him and the cat.
But wait, there’s more. I’ve had a number of dogs over the years and he was always the one who babysat my “kids”. I trusted him completely and he loved it! I would take my dogs frequently to visit him. He loved having dogs in his home again. He also babysat siblings’ dogs as well. Everyone knew my dad could be entrusted to his care.
I had a dog named Shebe who had cancer. One day, her back legs became paralyzed. The paralysis was spreading over her entire body within a few hours. Her life was coming to an end. My vet told me to bring her to him. My dad “watched” Shebe alot for me. I called him and he wanted to be with as we took Shebe for her last ride. He wanted to be with Shebe and me as we said our goodbyes. He loved my pets as much as he loved his own.
Over the years as he watched my passion for animals bloom into what I do as an animal welfare advocate, we shared that as well. He watched me on many tv programs as a host and as a guest on other shows. He listened to me on the radio. I have done public service announcements (PSA’s) for tv and radio and he even listened to them on the radio during the overnight hours when he was unable to sleep.
What excited me most when it came to my dad about tv and radio programs I was involved with is the knowledge he gained about different animal issues. He said he learned alot and had no idea about puppy mills, particularly in PA. He always seem fascinated about my topics and always wanted to learn more. He didn’t realize how much suffering animals endure in so many arenas. He always asked me the dates and times of tv and radio programs. He didn’t want to miss any. He was one of my biggest cheerleaders with my work.
In December, I was asked to be the keynote speaker at First State Greyhound’s annual Gala Dinner slated for February. I gladly accepted this honor. By January, my dad’s health took a sudden and unexpected turn for the worse. I had no idea what to do about this speaking engagement. I told my dad about it and it was his response that led me to make the decision to talk at the dinner. By the time of the gala, my dad’s health was critical. This event was on a Saturday and the following Wednesday I had to do my show on BCTV. As difficult as it was and it was, I did last month’s program. I went directly to see my dad after the show and told him. Although my dad wasn’t able to talk at this point, he responded positively when I told him I did the show. I knew he supported my decision.
Two days later, I talked to my dad and I told him Shadow and Jazz said hi as I did frequently. Before he became very ill, he always asked about my “boys”. As I sat with him, I instinctively knew he didn’t have much time left here on earth. I felt in a way he held on so I could be at the gala and do my tv show since I had spoken to him several times about each in the previous weeks.
When I visited him the next day, I leaned over and whispered into his ear that it was okay to leave. I entrusted my dogs to him and I knew he entrusted his life with me. I had told him previously it was okay to leave but now I told him to leave. Leave to be with my mom, sister and all of the furry friends he and I have had or encountered. I told him everything would be okay. I knew in my heart he wanted my permission. As soon as he heard me, he took his last breaths just minutes later.
This has to be one of the most difficult entries I have ever written. I’ve been told my dad is in a better place. I know he is free of pain and the binds that took a once vital man to someone who had to depend on others completely. Yes, he’s free but his physical absence in my life has caused a void that will be felt for the rest of my life.
I miss my dad so very much but am so thankful for the passion for animals he passed onto me whether it be inherited or influenced by environment. I want to thank him for all of his support with my work.
I also must thank him for his stubborness and tenacious spirit. I possess those traits as well. My dad wasn’t always the easiest person to contend with and he knew it. I knew he hated what was happening to his body and me being the optimistic person I am, always tried to look for new ways for him to help himself. He wasn’t always open to new ideas but eventually would come around and see the benefits of my ideas. He was one tough cookie. But, we would eventually talk about it and have a good laugh about his stubborness.
It will be that stubborness and tenacity that will help me lead on to help those who suffer in this world.
When I spoke at the gala, I told the wonderful people of First State Greyhound something that my dad told me. He said I was making a difference in the world and he told me to reach for the sky. Aim high, he said. He told me not to limit myself and I have no intention of doing so.
Dad, I miss you and love you. May you finally have peace and regain the freedom you lost.
Your loving daughter, Christina